


When God of Thunder Wants Your Head

by kawusia25



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, I'm Sorry, If You Squint - Freeform, M/M, No Beta, crossover AU, geraskier if you squint, i don't know how it happend but jaskier sleeps with loki, just don't kill me, we die like witchers, witcher/mcu crossover
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-18
Updated: 2020-03-18
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:41:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23206408
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kawusia25/pseuds/kawusia25
Summary: What happens when you sleep with someone you shouldn't and now a God of Thunder wants to kill you?Let's find out.
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Jaskier | Dandelion, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion, Jaskier/Loki
Comments: 3
Kudos: 86





	When God of Thunder Wants Your Head

**Author's Note:**

> I saw a gifset of Geralt and underneath it was gifset of Thor and i had this amazing idea of them meeting together, that I had to write it. I have more ideas for this, but let’s start with that. 
> 
> Also I wanted to say, it’s my first time writing for this fandom, so please be gentle :)

Bright sun is warming ground underneath his feet, spring breeze coming through the town, blowing green leaves and white hair, promising a good day. 

And Geralt enjoys the weather, checking for the last time all his bags, if he didn’t left anything in the inn he spent his last night in. It’s important that he has everything, so he can get on the Path full prepared. After he’s sure every thing is in place, he takes Roach out of stable and leads her to the main square, looking for the bard that he left yesterday to tent to himself, when witcher had gone to his hunt.

He met with the musician two days ago, on the Path on his way from Kaer Morhen. It’s not unusual for them to meet like that every spring. It actually became a pattern for them. They meet somewhere on the road, Jaskier yapping about his time in some court or other, asking Geralt about his winter, talking his ear off, while they travel from one town to the other looking for monsters and hungry for entertainment audiences to earn a coin.

And luck must be in their favor, because the first place they stumble upon is lacking cheer and have a great kikimora problem. They rent a room and split up as the evening comes, to do their respective jobs. 

When Geralt gets back from the hunt, he sees Jaskier in his element, playing song after song, winking and flirting with everyone who pays attention to him. So witcher didn’t bother to stay, deciding it’s better to go to their room and rest for the night, especially that it looks that it will take a while for Jaskier to finish.

So when Geralt wakes up well rested and without any indication of bard coming up for the night, he packs their stuff and leaves the inn, to look for his companion, who probably spent the rest of the evening in someone else’s embrace. 

Which brings us to this moment, where he spots Jaskier talking to the tall and lean man, clothed in green and black with golden accents, his black hair slicked back. Judging by his appearance, the man must be some sort of royalty or lordship at least. Oh, how Geralt detest these people. It’s time to end this.

“Jaskier” he calls to his companion to catch his attention.

The man in question turns and smiles brightly spotting Geralt. He turns to the figure his talking to, saying rushed goodbyes and making his way to the witcher, small spring in his step.

“Good day to you, my darling companion! I guess it’s our time to take our leave and look for new adventure somewhere else?” Jaskier’s eyes sparkled in the sun, rosy cheeks accenting them more. 

“Hmm.”

“I see, talkative as always” Jaskier smiled, falling a step behind the witcher.

* * *

They decided to take a north road and traveled at least for an hour. 

Geralt sat on top of Roach, his yellow gaze covering every inch of the forest next to them, looking for every small move that could indicate danger. His ears straining for every rustle out of place, at the same time ignoring insistent humming from his left.

Jaskier had to be in a really good mood to be humming evey song known to man for more than a half an hour. He rarely saw the bard so happy, content and relaxed at the same time. Most of the time it was one of the three, so he’d really had a good lay in the hay. 

(Not to think that Geralt was jealous of Jaskier’s exploits. No.)

Yet, the witcher also felt better than ever. Maybe it’s the day they’re having? So peaceful and quiet.

Yeah, that must be it.

Even though, this thought didn’t stop his mouth from uttering “Had fun?”

“Oh Geralt! You wouldn’t believe it! What that man could do! Magnificent things I didn’t even dream of!” Jaskier got that dreamy look in his eyes, his whole face relaxing at the thought of the previous night. “Oi, but I don’t kiss and tell, so I won’t say a word more”

“That would be a first” Geralt chuckled under his nose

Apparently he did it loud enough for the bard’s ears to register what he just muttered.

“I’ll have you know that I don’t do that! I a man of honor and I do not share such a private details with anyone!” he tries to hit Geralt on the leg, but in the process he only hurts his hand, making no harm to the man on the horse. “Even if you hear some of the details, it is certainly not from me.” 

Jaskier lamented more and more, but Geralt didn’t bother listening to the smaller man, because something shifted in the air, the atmosfer got tensed, crackling with additional energy. His medalion started warming up and vibrating against his chest, confirming witcher’s suspicion that something is going to happen. That something was coming. 

Just as a wind increased in strength, lightning hit next to them, and next second Jaskier was pinned to the tree closest to them with burly man standing over him.

“Where is Loki?!” he roared in smaller man’s face

In that moment, Geralt hoped down from Roach, grabbing for the hilt of his sword, unsheathing it, in stance ready to attack the man.

Jaskier tried to say something, but blonde man’s closing hand on his throat was making the whole process harder for him. His face started to go red, the consequences of not getting oxygen in to his lungs obvious to everyone.

Geralt without thinking used Aard to throw the attacker from his companion.

The man in question landed few feet from them, his brows furrowing, face contorting in anger, his stance ready to pounce at any moment.

“I don’t have time for games, I just need to know where Loki is, so get out of my way!” 

“I don’t think so.” Geralt replied, readying for the attack.

And he was not disappointed. Man’s angry blue eyes locked onto witchers, teeth bared and roar on his lips as he throw a hammer (HAMMER?!) in his direction. Geralt swiftly avoided the weapon, twisting his hand with sword in the direction of his opponent. Attacker blocked it without problem, throwing his fist to witcher’s face. 

Attack to attack, punch for the punch, blows coming rapidly at each other, non faltering in their movements, both determined to overpower their opponent, locked in beautiful yet terrifying dance. 

Geralt was surprised that this burly man had no problem with moving like panter, considering that he was in the armor that looked to incredibly limiting for such movements. And this ridiculous cape!

In one moment of distraction from his opponent, witcher took opportunity, positioned behind the man, blocked his right hand and used his own with the sword to bring the blade to his neck. Face next to his, both breathing hard, Geralt whispread

“Who are you and what is your problem, or else...” and put a little more pressure on the man’s throat.

“I’m Thor Odinson, and your companion over there knows about whereabouts of my brother Loki” 

“If I release you, will you behave and won’t attack us, so we can talk?” Geralt asked

Thor noded his head, blade of the sword leaving it’s post on his neck.

Geralt stepped from the man, his gaze looking for Jaskier’s silhouette. When he spotted him in the same place Thor was pining him down, he came to him, looking him over.

Jaskier’s panicked eyes were observing Odnison, till he felt witcher’s hands on his neck, changing the object of his observation. Now, they were focused on the warm gold of Geralt’s eyes, checking his injuries.

“We need to put salve on these, so they can heal” White-haired man decided, his fingertips skimming through purple brusies. “We will make camp and try to sort this out” was the last thing he said before getting to work.

* * *

All there of them found a small clearing between the trees and made their camp there. Geralt collected dry wood for a small campfire and lit it up. He reached to his bags on Roach to get the salve for Jaskier throat and sat next to him.

Jaskier tipped his head back, so witcher could have a better access to his injuries. Calloused fingers put a cold cream on his skin, making Jaskier shudder from pleasure it brought him

“Speak.” Geralt only said to the man on the opposite from them.

“As I said previously, I’m Thor Odinson and I’m looking for my brother” 

“Loki, right?” Jaskier asked

“Yes, him. I’m certain that you know where I can find him” Thor looked at the bard with his piercing blue eyes.

“Hmm. Why’s that?” Geralt demanded

“This man...” Thor pointed at the brunette “... reeks of him. I’ve been looking all over this land, and his the only trope I’ve got.”

“But I don’t know any under such name...”

“Describe him” White-haired man inquired

“Tall, lean, black hair, well-spoken, dangerous...”

Geralt looked meaningfully at Jaskier.

“Oh, now I get it, but to be perfectly clear, I didn’t catch his name” Jaskier put his hands on his hips, glaring at Geralt.

Geralt only rolled his eyes. “Why do you need to find him?”

“He possesses very powerful artifact I need to take from his mischievous hands” Blonde answered, playing with the strap of his hammer.

“Ok, we will help you...” Geralt got up from the spot next to Jaskier.

“Yes?” There was hope slowly creeping in Thor’s face

“Yeah, first thing tomorrow. Now, we eat and sleep” 

**Author's Note:**

> I might write more on this bc I really want to see Thor and Geralt talking about their hair and maybe some Jealous!Geralt when Jaskier is daydreaming about Thor. We will see...


End file.
